There are three things I remember from when I was 8 years old: Mrs. Phillips calling me out in front of my entire third grade class for picking my nose; winning back-to-back “Around the World” math championships; and Tom Brady upsetting my beloved Rams in the Super Bowl.
Even though the Rams had won the Super Bowl just two years prior, there was no numbing for the Super Bowl loss. We were heavy favorites, with one of the greatest offenses in NFL history being quarterbacked by the original Tim Tebow, Kurt Warner.
It was the first time I had cried for something other than a physical injury. Over the next few years, I watched as the Patriots and Rams went on two very different paths, with the Patriots becoming a dynasty, and the Rams becoming one of the worst teams in the league.
And I blamed all of it on Tom Brady.
I asked God, “Why did Drew Bledsoe have to get hurt?” and “Who was the inbred that came up with the tuck rule?”
With every win, and endorsement deal, the legend of Tom Brady grew. And so did my undying hatred.
However, that hatred began to dissipate after the Giants beat the previously undefeated Patriots in Super Bowl XLII, which many, including yours truly, consider to be the greatest upset in Super Bowl history.
Finally karma had come back around and bit Brady in his golden boy ass. Justice had been served and he could feel the agony that he had caused Rams Nation to endure six years earlier.
At the time, I was in my teenage years, beginning to appreciate the beauty of women and admire the men who formed relationships with the fairer sex. And being a teenage boy, I was well aware of who Gisele Bündchen was. A legendary supermodel and screensaver, who goes by just “Gisele,” Bündchen’s spouse is Tom Brady.
If you’re married to someone who goes by just their first name, you’ve earned the respect of males everywhere. Tom Brady had earned my respect.
Around the same time, I completed the teenage male rite of passage of watching the entire series of “Entourage.” Tom Brady makes a cameo in the sixth season.
A lot of us are like Turtle at the start of the episode, blindly hating Brady for strictly football reasons. But by the end of the episode we can’t get enough of the guy. We’re jealous that Turtle gets to grab dinner with this great-looking guy with a smoke-show wife.
Following that episode, it hit me that Tom Brady is one the coolest guys on the planet.
Then a couple months ago, I saw the commercial that cemented his status on the Mount Rushmore of cool right next to Brad Pitt, Justin Timberlake and Jay-Z (Johnny Manziel and Rob Gronkowski will be joining them up there shorty).
It starts with Brady on a bus with his high school alma mater’s football and baseball teams, the Junipero Serra Padres. Brady arises, sporting a peacoat and his permanent five o’clock shadow. His facial expression is blank, yet intense. He walks to the front of the bus, which transforms into the Michigan football locker room. Brady acknowledges a few of the players but keeps moving as the next setting is a living room full of trophies and a television showing the clip of Brady being drafted 199th overall in the 2000 NFL Draft.
Brady then walks through a press conference and then back on another bus, but this time it’s the Patriots’. He grabs a leather satchel and gets off the bus, looking up at a massive stadium. The commercial then cuts to the UGG logo. The commercial is 61 seconds long. Brady’s shoes are shown for approximately seven.
Brady has done some miraculous things on the football field, but making UGGs for men cool? The legend continues.