Do you love freezing in your house? The threat of armed robberies? Having your number of daily guests regulated? Then Aspen Heights is the place for you.
Over this past summer I, along with more than 600 other students, received the email that Aspen Heights would not be completed on time. Now, I get it; things get delayed. There are a variety of factors that can cause a huge housing development like this to fall behind schedule. So you would assume that due to this HUGE inconvenience they were causing their residents, they would handle it in a professional and accommodating manner, right? Wrong.
Instead, Aspen Heights decided to close their offices and not answer phone calls for three days following the email. But this delayed start was only the beginning of the trouble with this lovely establishment. All of these houses appear to have been built in about a week — just thrown together with the least amount of possible effort. Paint splatters over every kitchen surface, unfinished concrete floors that resemble a garage. I even had to install my own doorknob on my bedroom door. It came in a box on my counter. I guess I really didn’t need the doorknob since the door didn’t fit in the door frame anyway. But whatever you do, do not get the furniture package. It’s cheap and heinous. I’m pretty sure my dentist invested more into furnishing his waiting room.
Most residents of Aspen Heights want to move out, but the local criminals certainly love it here. Shootings, armed robberies and alleged rapes are all included on the rap sheet of this community. But Aspen Heights’ security targets its residents instead of the unwelcome offenders. Just sit by your window for a few hours, and you will see one of Aspen Height’s “courtesy patrol officers” pass by at least five times. These guys live on-site and are constantly watching us, handing out $1,000 fines for house parties, counting our invited guests and handing out speeding tickets, while the real intruders sneak in unnoticed.
Yet, nothing makes me feel more at home than a lockdown. I particularly enjoyed getting locked out of the entire property until 1 a.m. during finals week (last semester) because cops had barricaded the entrance. Of course, one of the selling points of Aspen Heights is its wonderful amenities. Supposedly, it has a “24-hour” pool. Take it from the girl who was escorted out at 12:30 a.m., we are not welcome 24 hours a day. Or maybe you’re considering living there because it is a gated community. Well, get your cat-like reflexes ready for when the gate almost hits your car or for when it takes 10 minutes to open because there is a stiff breeze. And this place is not cheap. On top of the overpriced rent, Aspen Heights is now handing out up to $400 utility bills. Their explanation for these outrageous bills? “It’s cold.”
Hell will freeze over before I plan to live here another year. Oops. I forgot. It already did. That’s why our utility bills are so high.
