There is a community of people who believe that being black is just an “accidental case of pigmentation,” that it isn’t a part of your identity at all. This same community of people tends to wish that people didn’t look at them and see black. They wish people looked at them and just saw people. Well, I’m here to tell you that’s a crock of bull. There will never be a day anytime soon when someone looks at you and doesn’t see that you’re black. Our mothers always told us not to judge a book by its cover, but we can all attest that not judging a book by its cover is virtually impossible.
I can’t deny that when I meet someone new, the first thing I account for is their race. And I’m almost positive that this is what everyone else does involuntarily. Society has conditioned us to notice different races and, if it hadn’t, maybe fewer innocent black people would die each year from police brutality. I can promise that if those officers could recognize anything else about the suspects before their race, half of the brutal deaths of black people would have been avoided.
Your race is your identity because that’s what everyone else notices about you first. If you were to look at me before an introduction, what could you see about me other than my race? My outfit could probably give an insight to my personality, but nothing you’d get out of judging my outfit could really tell you something about me. You know what you’d be able to see before I begin to speak? I’m black. You can say that I have light brown skin and extremely curly hair, but the only thing you would get out of that is that I’m black.
I believe that if you’re black and wish that being black wasn’t a part of your identity, then maybe some self-love should be prescribed to you. Because wishing that people didn’t see you as what you are is both unrealistic and slightly self-loathing. You will never hear a white person wish that people didn’t see them as white, because white people know and benefit from white privilege.
You should never deny or disregard blackness as part of your identity because no one else will. If you want to deny blackness, don’t be surprised when no one else denies your blackness. When you run into a racist situation, don’t be surprised that person never get the memo that you denied your blackness. And when a black person looks at you and says something that translates to you as “you understand because you’re black,” don’t be surprised that they never get the memo that you denied your blackness, either.
Being black will always be a part of your identity, so embrace it or live in misery.