“RuPaul’s Drag Race” is widely known as the most irreverent and outrageous reality show on television, and has spread the art of drag to a wider audience by giving drag queens a larger spotlight.
In addition to the eight America’s Next Drag Superstars (if you include “All-Stars” winner Chad Michaels) and 100 alumni, “Drag Race” has also given the world more lackluster singles than even the strongest ears could bear.
But that doesn’t mean there aren’t a few hidden pearls in the sea of mediocrity.
In honor of the March 7 premiere of Rupaul’s Drag Race Season 8, here is a list of the top five songs from “Drag Race” alumni:
**“Your Makeup Is Terrible” by Alaska 5000**
Alaska 5000’s voice is an entirely inexplicable force of nature. In “Your Makeup Is Terrible,” she takes complete advantage of her whiny tone with a jumble of word garbage followed by her signature “Hieeeeeee!” This song makes fun of the typical dance song, pointing out the “really serious part of the song” and eventually admitting that her own makeup is also terrible.
**“Thick Thighs” by Willam (feat. Latrice Royale)**
This song is absolutely everything that Meghan Trainor’s “All About That Bass” and Jennifer Lopez’s “Booty” should have been. Willam, the most controversial contestant in “Drag Race” history, and Latrice Royale, often called the “Oprah Winfrey of drag,” team up to praise all types of thighs through a rap style reminiscent of Gwen Stefani’s “Hollaback Girl” and possibly the least subtle chorus ever written.
**“Coffee and Wine” by Jinkx Monsoon**
Jinkx Monsoon is an anomaly among “Drag Race” contestants, and her music is no exception to her uniqueness. Her style comes from the Broadway school of singing, and her songs would be right at home in a cabaret performance. “Coffee and Wine” praises the perfect combination of her favorite beverages and laments the lack of time to enjoy the momentary balance of drunkenness and sharpened wit.
**“I Adore You” by Adore Delano**
If this song was sung by Miley Cyrus or Katy Perry, it would have been a radio smash. No complaints here, though, because Adore Delano’s astounding voice and attitude are far more entertaining. This self-titled song oscillates between a heartfelt pop ballad in the verse and a chorus that combines rap with gorgeous harmonies.
**“American Apparel Ad Girls” by Willam, Courtney Act and Alaska 5000**
After shooting an actual advertising campaign for hipster clothing retailer American Apparel, these three queens decided to continue the project with this frankly bizarre single. Unknown to most who have heard it, the song is actually a parody of “Farrah Fawcett Hair,” a mostly unknown song by Capital Cities. Can it get any more hipster than that? The parody is stuffed full of “Drag Race” references, both obvious and obscure, and nonsensical bits of conversation. Every listen uncovers a new nugget of lyrical ridiculousness.
**Bonus: “Supermodel (You Better Work)” by RuPaul**
It is very likely that none of these songs, and arguably not the show itself, would have existed without RuPaul’s greatest hit, “Supermodel (You Better Work).” This song received massive radio play in the early 90s and made RuPaul a household name. “Supermodel” is stuffed full of now iconic RuPaul-isms set to an irresistible dance beat. It still stands as the strongest of RuPaul’s endless singles, and no “Drag Race” fan can go without a listen.
