After the most recent football game, my friends and I decided to eat Shakespeare’s Pizza. Once we ordered our Masterpiece, sat down and minded our own business, we heard a conversation that sparked a heated discussion.
Two men sat about three tables away from us, talking normally and minding their own business, until a woman walked past them. One man commented on her outfit, saying it was so sensual that there was no way she did not want to be looked at. He continued, saying that there was no way she walked out of the house thinking all she wanted to do was look good for herself. His friend laughed in agreement.
Society constantly has something to say about what women wear: “That’s too revealing.” “That’s too old-fashioned.” “You look like you’re practically naked.” “That’s too masculine.” “That’s too feminine.” “You’re showing too much cleavage.” “You’re not showing enough cleavage.”
Women are taught not to drink too much when they go out, to watch their drinks at all times, never to walk alone at night and not to wear an outfit that is “too revealing” for fear of being assaulted. When are men taught not to rape women, rather than women having to cover up?
For women, living in a culture of rape means we rarely, if ever, feel safe walking home from anywhere as soon as the sun sets. It means we have to sacrifice our own personal fashion choices because we are horrified that someone may think we are “asking for it” and may take their actions a step too far.
Many women on college campuses have some form of pepper spray or mace with them at all times. The only time you might see a woman walking alone on a college campus is during daylight hours. It is sad that women need pepper spray just as much as they need their wallet when they go out at night.
Too often, people victim-blame by saying “she is asking for it.” The only thing an outfit reflects is someone’s fashion sense, not consent to sexual activity.
Women should not be patronized based on what they are wearing. They should not be hit on because of what they are wearing. A woman in a cute outfit is simply a woman in a cute outfit, not a woman asking for unwanted advances.
A woman’s fashion choice should never be an excuse for a sexual assault. Maybe that day, she felt extra confident or she is trying to make a fashion statement. No woman who walks in any public space in a “revealing” outfit is doing so because she wants to get assaulted, and it will never be that way.