My usual go-to when starting hot takes goes something like this: “It’s 2017; I can’t believe that this is _still_ an issue.” However, it is 2017, and so many crazy things have happened that I really am not surprised by anything anymore. One thing I have been fired up about lately is birth control. Before you stop reading, this isn’t about its availability or my personal stance on whether your healthcare should cover it; that’s another discussion for another day. What I want to talk about is the practice of splitting the cost of birth control.
It’s my personal opinion that, in a committed relationship, both parties should split the cost of their preferred birth control option. This is an opinion that doesn’t tend to be very popular with my male peers. Tradition seems to hold that if the preferred method is condoms, the man purchases them; if the woman prefers to use a female contraceptive, she bears the cost. While this seems to pass as the status quo for most people, it has never sat well with me.
The main rebuttal I hear against splitting the cost of birth control is that women don’t use birth control exclusively to prevent pregnancy. While I completely understand that, that line of thinking tends to miss the point. If you’re in a committed relationship with someone, and you and your partner use contraception for its initial purpose, then I don’t see why you both can’t help pay the cost. If a man happens to use condoms and a woman uses a female form of contraception, then I’d give the guy a cop-out. However, I’ve not known this to be the case most of the time.
Another point that tends to be brought up in this discussion is how women in relationships pay for their birth control. If insurance happens to pay for 100 percent of birth control costs, I’m not saying that guys should Venmo their girlfriends half of her health insurance bill. In addition, I wouldn’t advocate that girls who get their birth control paid for by their parents scam their boyfriends out of money every month. When insurance doesn’t pay for the entire cost of birth control and the woman is paying the difference, then I believe the man should contribute to the out-of-pocket costs.
I’m not just trying to hate on guys, though. If it so happens that you and your partner use condoms as your primary method of birth control, then I think the woman should contribute to the cost of them. Anyone who’s bought condoms before knows they aren’t the cheapest, and if you aren’t into regularly swiping them from either Planned Parenthood or the sexual health resources on campus, the cost can add up.
Why do I believe this? It’s simple: We should be living in a society where issues like this are not taboo things we just don’t like to think about. Sexual health and contraception should be open for discussions in relationships. Gender roles and norms can (and should) be ignored, especially with respect to who’s paying for birth control. Just because one party isn’t actively using the birth control doesn’t mean both parties aren’t benefitting. Whether it’s splitting the cost of the pill or condoms, having the conversation about paying for contraceptives is important, and I think it’s time we stop letting one party pay for everything because “that’s just how it’s always been.”