If you’ve seen the advertisements for “Winter’s Tale,” you might be a little perplexed.

Your first impression after watching the trailer will most likely be something along the lines of: “Okay, so it’s about two people who fall in love … and then somehow the guy ends up in the future? Alrighty then.”

If you go see the movie expecting a straightforward romance/time travel flick (maybe something like “The Time Traveler’s Wife”?), you’ll get thrown a few curveballs thrown at you — a Pegasus, a horde of demons, guardian angels and Will Smith playing Lucifer while wearing shiny hoop-earrings.

Let me explain: In “Winter’s Tale,” Colin Farrell plays Peter Lake, a thief living in 1916 New York. He’s being hunted by a horde of demons led by Pearly Soames (Russell Crowe), who is working for Lucifer to “blacken souls and crush miracles.” Peter manages to escape Pearly on the back of a flying white horse, who becomes his guardian angel throughout the film.

The horse brings Peter to a lavish home, which Peter breaks into and tries to rob. However, he’s caught in the act by Beverly Penn (Jessica Brown Findlay), the young woman who lives there. She offers him tea and the two engage in polite small talk. Beverly asks, “What’s the best thing you’ve ever stolen?” To which Peter replies, “I’m beginning to think I haven’t stolen it yet.” What a charmer.

Of course, the two fall in love, but Beverly soon reveals to Peter that she is dying of consumption. Then she does. And it’s all very sad and bleak and somber and other negative emotions. Then Peter is thrown off of a bridge by Pearly and miraculously survives, but he suffers amnesia and spends the next 100 years, never aging, wandering over New York not knowing who he is.

I’m just as confused as you. I was a little blindsided sitting in that theater, where half of the audience left at various points throughout the showing and could be heard laughing loudly just outside the doors.

The screenwriting is a mess. At one point Beverly’s father (William Hurt) and Peter have an argument over the correct pronunciation of “fillet.” The characters also utter laughably awful lines, such as “We’ve only just met and I feel like I’ve known her for 1,000 years,” and “Is it possible to love someone so completely that they can’t die?” (And yes, in the world of this movie it is very possible).

“Winter’s Tale” is all about miracles and falling madly in love and saying cheesy things. The story isn’t exactly the most coherent, the characters aren’t exactly worth rooting for, the movie itself isn’t exactly worth spending your money on. Just don’t do it, guys. This date night movie is a complete and utter train wreck.

On the bright side, at least I got to stare into Colin Farrell’s dreamy brown eyes for two hours.