In 2007, Apple sold 72 million iPhones. That number has increased every year since, and during the first fiscal quarter of 2016 alone, they sold just over 74 million. There is no denying technology has become a major factor in our lives. We are told that technology should make communicating easier, but what has happened is the exact opposite.
One misconception about technology is that just because our phones, laptops and tablets allow faster communication, we are inherently better communicators. Yes, technology makes it easier to communicate, but we are starting to lack the basic skills that actual human interaction entails.
In Geoffrey Tumlin’s book “Stop Talking, Start Communicating,” he talks about how society has grown too reliant on technology when it comes to communicating. “The digital communication revolution has encouraged us to expect way too much from our digital devices and far too little from each other,” he writes. The next time you go out to lunch or dinner with friends, just take a look around the restaurant, or even your own table, at the number of people who are on their phones. You would be amazed at how many people can’t put their devices aside for 30 minutes to enjoy the company they are with.
Ask yourself: When was the last time you actually went up to someone’s door and knocked or rang the doorbell? For me, it has to be sometime back in high school, which was over four years ago. We have become so attached to our devices that instead of knocking we just text the person we’re meeting or picking up, “Here.” We don’t even call people anymore. Everything can be solved by a simple text message or Snapchat.
Take a look at how dating has changed in the past 10 years. We have apps like Tinder, Bumble and Grindr that take all the human interaction out of meeting people for the first time. A lot of times before we even actually meet someone in person, we have been “talking” to them long enough to “think” we know them. Very rarely do we actually meet someone new, in person, for the first time anymore.
“Facebook me” or “follow me on Instagram” have become phrases that carry too much weight in our daily lives. We friend people on social media and then we think we get to know that person through their online persona. Just because you are friends on Facebook or follow each other on Instagram doesn’t mean you genuinely know that person. Sitting down with someone for lunch or a drink and actually having a face-to-face conversation is how you really get to know someone.
“Consciously or not, we’ve quickly downshifted our expectations for our interpersonal conversations and focused too much on our devices,” Tumlin writes.
Technology can be used as a great tool to keep in touch with people and share things in your life that you think others would enjoy, but using it to create relationships and foster new ones is hindering our ability to communicate with one another. Instead of Facebook stalking your next date, try something new. Set a time and place and go into it with an open mind. You may be surprised at what happens if you leave technology at the door.
