We all do it.
And no, “it” is not referring to sex and/or pooping. “It” is in reference to creeping. If you have access to a computer and Facebook account, you have cyber-searched your crush and/or your crush’s ex.
No need to lie to yourself. This is a safe space.
Not to toot my own horn, but I consider myself an expert creeper. I once sought and found a guy my friend was crushing on based on hair color and hometown in eight minutes. I know, I know. Impressive.
Creeping is often associated with a negative connotation. But there is nothing wrong with doing a little research. The purpose of Facebook is to connect with people. You wouldn’t fill your timeline with random thoughts if you didn’t expect someone to see and/or comment on your most recent status about how your skin smells of coffee (at least mine does).
I have a tendency to look up the attractive guest speaker or seek out the handsome guy across the Student Center, but I also like to creep on my own friends. Just to see what they’re up to, you know?
It’s like dominoes. You see a picture, you click. That then leads you to another picture, then you click on a tagged friend, which takes you to a different profile. Then another, and another, and before you know it, it’s hours later and you’re Photoshopping a beautiful stranger’s face (with whom you share one mutual friend) with your own to see what your kids would like. (Don’t actually do that. That’s quite a way past the line of sanity.)
The worst part is how easy Facebook makes knowing what’s going on in friends’ lives. There is literally a live update of what your friends are doing and what statuses they’re liking on the right side. Why would Facebook do that to me when it knows how unhealthy it is?
But even though I am a talented tracker and acknowledge that I have a problem, I understand that there are limits and boundaries that one cannot ignore. There is a fine line between a subtle Facebook perusal and the “I’m going to learn about your entire life story and regurgitate it to you.” That’s when it becomes weird.
As a journalism student, I understand the desire to maintain a prominent social media presence. I like to say silly things publically. I like to get recognized for my wit and humor. However, that doesn’t mean I want my statuses to be the topic of every conversation with a person. I don’t like when people memorize everything about me. That is when it branches into stalkerdom.
To go on a tangent about the term “stalk,” it is important to be aware of the difference between creeping and stalking. Creeping can be funny and entertaining, while stalking is serious and unacceptable. Don’t use cyberstalking to describe what you’re doing when perusing every single profile picture of your great-looking TA. That’s just research.
I feel like creeping is worse for the single. With no commitment to a significant other, we can browse the Twittersphere/Facebook timeline with ease and without shame. I can learn about someone’s political and religious views in seconds, read up on their likes and dislikes, see where they went to high school and whether they’re currently “in a relationship.” It’s so simple.
That all being said, maybe we should slow down on the creeping. I know, what a crazy concept, but I’ve gotten to the point where I’ve lost communication skills. I have strictly social media friends that I see in real life all the time, but I’ve never actually spoken with them in person. I don’t ask as many questions because I already know the answer. I miss the opportunity to create relationships that go beyond the surface because of creeping.
In a world where social media and the Internet thrive, I think it’s pretty important to take a step back and consider getting to know people the old-fashioned way, rather than just scanning someone’s profile and calling it good.
