We’ve all been there. The guy or girl over whom you’re currently obsessing is obsessing over someone who is NOT you. It’s awful. It’s painful. But you’re a masochist who can’t stop thinking about him or her.

This has been the story of my life for many years now. Every time I like a guy, he’s either in a relationship or just beginning one. This is going back to the guy I previously mentioned in my love-at-first-sight column a couple weeks back. Social media told me that he’s got a lady.

Now if I’m being completely honest with myself, I don’t have a chance with this guy (though my grandmother is encouraging pursuit). He’s the Jake Ryan to my Samantha Baker, sans the John Hughes happy ending, but it was still nice to dream. (If you don’t get that “Sixteen Candles” reference, shame on you.)

Of course, the Jake Ryan character in my life isn’t the only person with whom this has happened. There have been plenty of guys in my short 19 years who I’ve swooned over and who are awesome humans. Unfortunately, someone else got to them first.

In this situation, there is really nothing you can do about it. Not unless you want to be an awful person and wreck a relationship for personal gain. But seriously, why would you do that? Let them be happy. You’ll get your chance.

When I talk to friends about the individual of my admiration gone south, they try to make me feel better by degrading the girl my crush is dating. Note to all friends: don’t do that. It’s mean. She could be great.

One of the things that cause people (i.e., me) to feel so self-conscious is hearing the way friends talk about others. If my best friend degrades a girl by commenting on her intelligence or aesthetics, it makes me wonder what she would say about me if I wasn’t on her good side. Just something to consider.

I had this situation occur once when a friend had been enamored with a guy to the point that we had a code name and we would text each other when he was around (yes, girls do this). We tried to decode the meaning of every interaction. Was he interested? He laughed at that joke! What does that _mean?_

Then one day, he introduced us to his new lady friend. It was awful. I’d been so invested in my friend’s budding relationship that the thought of this guy being with another woman was sickening. I wanted to detest this unknown girl, and it wasn’t even my love life. But any time I tried to cheer up my friend, I couldn’t say mean things about the faceless competitor. All I could think was that she was probably great if our guy friend was with her. All I could do was be there for my friend.

The good news about this little tale is that I was right. The girl is actually great. So great, in fact, that we’re good friends now. The best part of the story is that my infatuated friend found another and hasn’t looked back. It was all in the timing.

With timing being one of the most important parts to any relationship, it’s time to talk about the end of our time together.

With this being my last official Single Girl Diaries (I might continue in a blog or something), I have a few things I’ve wanted to share that just never seemed to fit (and may be super cheesy, so just go with it).

First: I’d like to express my gratitude to those dedicated readers out there. I’m not sure if it’s because we’re friends and I forced my column upon you, or whether you’re a total stranger who just enjoyed laughing at the silly things I write, but thank you for sticking it out.

Second: I make fun of relationships and my lack thereof daily, but I want you all to know that regardless of whether you’re single or have a significant other, you’re awesome. You’re amazing, beautiful, kind, intelligent and overall good souls. Stick to who you are.

Third: This column has been such a journey for me as an individual. I know I’ve tried (too hard?) to be funny, but in the end, it required me to think about aspects of my life I’ve never explored before.

Thank you for the opportunity to write and get my voice out there. I don’t really know how to end a column… Bye?