It’s a difficult task for presidential candidates to find a good rally walk-out song. It doesn’t help that musicians promptly ask candidates they don’t support to stop using their music; most recently, Adele spoke out against Donald Trump using her work. Well, luckily for them, I’ve assembled a little guide for some more fitting walk-out songs for the candidates.
Hillary Clinton — “I Am Not A Robot” by Marina And The Diamonds
Hillary Clinton’s strategists and campaign aides said the candidate plans to “show more humor and heart,” The New York Times reported in September. Satirical publication The Onion struck back with a headline of their own: “Campaign staffers making progress conditioning Hillary Clinton to replicate emotions.” “I Am Not A Robot” might be the missing ingredient in Clinton’s effort to persuade audiences that she is human.
Bernie Sanders — “Billionaire” by Travie McCoy feat. Bruno Mars
Bernie Sanders is always talking about bringing down millionaires and billionaires. He should prepare his audience for him to say “billionaires” a billion times by playing this tongue-in-cheek selection.
**Jeb Bush: “Unknown Brother” by The Black Keys**
George W. Bush served two terms as president, but his brother Jeb is fighting just to remain in the race for his candidacy. “Unknown Brother” sums up his current position pretty well. A good runner-up, inspired by when he asked an audience to “please clap,” is Lady Gaga’s “Applause.” It’s OK, Jeb, we live for the applause too.
**Ben Carson — “Daysleeper” by R.E.M. / “I’m So Tired” by The Beatles / “I’m Only Sleeping” by The Beatles / “Talking In Your Sleep” by The Romantics**
OK, four songs might seem a little excessive, but Carson might need a longer, louder playlist to wake him up before he gets to the podium.
**Chris Christie — “Bridge Over Troubled Water” by Simon and Garfunkel**
One of Chris Christie’s biggest obstacles this election will be defending himself when it comes to the Bridgegate scandal. Maybe a nice song will distract the voters?
**Ted Cruz — “Hurt Feelings” by Flight of the Conchords**
Ted Cruz had a [“I came out to have a good time and I’m honestly feeling so attacked right now”](http://www.buzzfeed.com/musiclover6495/this-new-meme-is-all-you-need-in-the-world-na3d#.tnj5kJGGR) moment during the Jan. 28 debate. His threat to leave the debate if he was asked “one more mean question” can only be given justice by the iconic “Hurt Feelings.”
**Carly Fiorina — “Somebody That I Used To Know” by Gotye feat. Kimbra**
Fiorina was once a member of the [Big Kid debate](http://www.npr.org/2015/09/16/440972879/4-republican-presidential-candidates-debate-at-kids-table-event), but she has since vanished into oblivion. She’s still running, and she received a whopping 1.9 percent of the vote in Iowa! Now she’s just somebody that we used to know.
**Jim Gilmore — “Who Am I?” from the Les Miserables soundtrack / “Ignition (Remix)” by R. Kelly**
This is a music blog, not a politics blog, so I’m not afraid to admit that I’ve never heard of this candidate before. (He got 0 percent of the vote in Iowa, so I’m not alone.) He’s probably not Jean Valjean or prisoner 24601, but “Who Am I?” just seems to fit. Also, I don’t know a lot about this guy, but “Ignition (Remix)” is good for pretty much any scenario.
**John Kasich — “Everything’s Not Lost” by Coldplay**
Well, Kasich didn’t end up last in Iowa. He only got 1.9 percent of the vote, but Christie and Gilmore were still below him, with 1.8 percent and 0% respectively. Since “Everything’s Not Lost” is probably the song he’s singing to himself as he falls asleep every night, why shouldn’t he just make it his walk-out song as well?
**Marco Rubio — “The Climb” by Miley Cyrus**
While a lot of media focus has been on Trump, Cruz and Carson, Marco Rubio has been gaining attention. He finished a close third in Iowa and was called [“The Republican Savior”](http://img.timeinc.net/time/magazine/archive/covers/2013/1101130218_400.jpg) by TIME Magazine. He’s climbing his way to the top, and there’s no better song to accompany such a journey than this nostalgic hit.
**Donald Trump — “American Idiot” by Green Day**
I don’t know why Trump has been playing Adele songs when he could just cut straight to the point. In fact, his rallies would probably be significantly less controversial if he just played this song and never actually appeared on the podium.
**DISCLAIMER: The presidential candidates drop their campaigns as fast as they jumped into the race so we're not updating this. Sorry not sorry.**